...who hates me. Like, HATES me. All-caps, bold, italicized, should really be about five font sizes larger for emphasis. This particular individual is, for whatever reason, following my blog and twitter posts, despite claiming he wants nothing to do with me. Which, of course, makes no sense. My blog and twitter posts don't go to his inbox, they don't appear on his front step, they're not on the news, and this is the first time I've even directly mentioned him. So why does he read?
My best guess? He's looking for ammunition. He wants to continue to wage war for me over events in the past. Or, perhaps, he's reading because he hopes to see that my life is falling apart or is somehow worse since he exited stage left.
Whatever his reasons for reading, I know he's not finding what he wants, because he's lashing out on me via the internet, posting personal and defamatory information about me and claiming he'll remove it if I "step up" and email him. Well, I'm not going to email him. I'm not going to badmouth him either and tell you all why we had a falling out or anything else about him. I'm not going to retaliate against his web-based harassment by posting personal information about him, or by making accusations cooked up in my imagination with no basis in fact.
I am not going to fight back.
This doesn't mean I'm weak, or that I'm giving in, or that he's won. It simply means I'm not going to put any effort into hatred. He hates me, and that's fine. I, on the other hand, have forgiven him for the wrongs he has committed against me. That doesn't mean I would risk them happening again by involving him in my life. It also doesn't mean I won't use my new pepper spray keychain, suggested by my therapist, if he ever tries to involve himself in my life again. I also will not be dropping the order of protection that I had taken out against him.
I will protect myself and my family, but I won't fight. Especially dirty.
Read all you like. If it makes you angry, then stop. I'm not going to be posting anything about you beyond this post, so there's really no reason for you to stick around. I won't fight with you anymore, ever again. I have forgiven you, and I have moved on. I suggest, for your sake, that you do the same.